Shame?

You know since it's been well over a year since my last post, that something really had to get me fired up! Recently I read somewhere that a woman was uncomfortable with the nurses and doctors talking about her labor progression with her while she was in labor. My knee jerk reaction to this was a little harsh, so I tried to step back and think about it from other points of view. What I came up with was this burning question of when and how have women become so uncomfortable and even ashamed with their bodies? I mean, our Creator designed us and all the intriquite details of the process. I understand that, especially as a Christian woman, I can't go around talking about my junk and giving out all sorts of details, and that modesty is important. However, I think it is extremely sad that the process of labor and birth has been made out to be this gross, messy, shameful event and the only good thing is the baby at the end. I agree, the baby at the end is the most fun part, but the journey getting to that end is amazing. When I was pregnant with Jonah I couldn't wait for the intimacy and closeness that the birth process would offer. Granted, my labor was very different than how I'd dreamed it would be, and I'm dealing with that, but even still I was never ashamed of what my body was doing. In fact, after it was all said and done, my husband called me his "superbirther" and my nurse said I was made for having babies. Let me tell you, I have never felt more powerful and feminine than I did when they were telling me this. So this also brings up another thought. I fully believe that my job as a Doula is to make every woman I assist feel this way. Yes, I have strong beliefs in a natural, unmedicated birth, but ultimately I want every mama to feel like the super power that she is as she has just brought life into this world. It isn't something to be shamed, it's something to be celebrated and I hope that our culture will start to embrace this more and because of that, women will begin to feel more free to express themselves in their journey to motherhood!
Doula Tiffany

Birth Story of Baby E

Tuesday I had the honor of being at a birth. I was the back up for another girl who wasn't able to be there with the expectant parents. They were admitted to the hospital about 6:00 pm on Tuesday night at 4 cm and her water had been broken for several hours already. So finally at about 1:30 am I received the call that I needed to be there to relieve the other girl and she hadn't dilated any further so they had started pitocin. By the time I arrived at the hospital she had been on pitocin for a while and had been coping very well. However, they were about to increase the drip and she decided to relax and progress she needed an epidural. Because of the meds, she had alot of shaking. We tried to manage the shaking by me rubbing some lavender essential oil on my fingertips and massaging her scalp. That was the only thing that worked! After about 15 minutes of me doing that, she was out like a light. The epidural was a great decision on her part, as within the next, approximately, 4 hours, she went from 5 centimeters to 10!! It was time to start pushing!

Most people that have an epidural need a while getting alot of direction on pushing. Well not this mommy! She picked it up on the first push. Not only did she pick it up like a champ, but she did it for 3 hours and 55 minutes and never complained. Not once! After almost 4 hours of pushing the doctor decided she needed a little help getting baby out, as she was at 41 weeks and there was meconium present in the fluid when her water broke. So with a little help from some forceps, baby girl E was born at 2:35pm on Wednesday afternoon.

Of course, seeing as how there was meconium present, they had to call in the special care doctors to check baby, and she had to be taken to NICU. She was perfectly healthy otherwise, weighing 7lbs 6 oz and beautiful as could be.

The parents were completely elated with the whole process, and I may not ever see a couple that loves and supports eachother more than these two. They were a great team, and did an awesome job in labor!

Happy Friday to All,
Doula Tiffany

1st Solo

Good Morning!! I think I am just now getting caught up on sleep and coming off of my rush from last week. Thursday, I had my first solo birth. It was AMAZING! Maybe not so much for the mommy, but for me, definitely. It was challenging. Probably the MOST challenging first birth anyone could have conjured up. But would I change it? NO! Well maybe the part where the baby went into distress and had to be born by emergency c-section. But, that's only because it wasn't in the mommy's plan. But mom and baby are both doing great! The sweet little baby girl weighed 8lbs 12oz and just didn't want to come out of the nice, warm place that had been created for her. :)
On Thursday night I got called up to the hospital because my girl was hurting pretty good. So, I mad my way up there and got to her at about 7pm. for the 5 hours or so, we bounced on the ball, swayed, tried turning the baby with hands and knees, and walked. Well, eventually the baby got tired of all that and went into distress. So as this sweet woman laid in bed she contracted VERY hard for a few more hours. With each contraction, I was putting intense pressure on her hips and lower back to try and ease some of the labor she was feeling in her back. We thought surely it was almost time. She was at 1cm. She had been contracting so hard from the pitocin, but was still not dilating. Finally she asked to be taken off and given the night to try and progress naturally. She was hungry and exhausted and she couldn't take any more pain without dilating. I told her how proud I was of her for going so many hours in that much pain and not asking for meds or c-section, which were HUGE goals for her. What a champ!! So, I left to go get a few hours of sleep, and to let her get some as well and told her to call me when things started moving. I never heard. I started to worry and at about 12:30 called to make sure everything was ok. No answer and more worry. Finally at about 2 I got the call that they had to be rushed in for an emergency c-section. My heart sunk, as I knew it wasn't what she wanted, and as I realized I wasn't there for it! I made my way up to the hospital to see them and that really made everything so much better. Once I saw that sweet baby girl and knew she was healthy, I knew that everything that had happened had to happen and all that mattered was that they were healthy. Again, she was so amazing to endure about 24 of back labor and not ask for anything to make the pain go away. I got some amazing experience with comfort measures and relating to hospital staff, so all in all I would say that everything turned out pretty great! Looking forward to my next one!!
Be fruitful and multiply,
Doula Tiffany

Another Week, Another Adventure

Well last week brought forth some interesting days. I got a taste of what it's like to live the life of a Doula. AND also a taste of how incredibly unpredictable birth is. I have a client, now 4 days past her due date. She was having contractions every 5 minutes and said she felt some pressure in her pelvis. To me, I thought hmm maybe she needs to get to the hospital, but when I called on the advice of the one I would say is my mentor, she knew immediately, that it wasn't time for that baby to be born. So, today, Monday, I still await the call for my service! I am still as excited (maybe even more) as I was last week, but I realize that my sitting around and thinking about it isn't going to make the baby come faster! :) Lesson #3698 learned. And that is the lesson to not stop your every waking move if someone has a contraction. I think I will get used to it!
A thought I've been having alot lately, is the parallel in this time of year and birth. It never ceases to amaze me when I look around and see a new bud sprouting on a flower, or a tree getting new leaves. And even more so, a mommy's belly begin to grow with the growth of her baby! God creates some pretty amazing things! Alright, that is all for today! I must get on with some other things! Have a great Monday!
Be fruitful and multiply,
Doula Tiffany

Hitting it Head On

Today was a big day for me. I actually put in writing, a business plan of action for my new adventure! Of course there are all the normal business planny type things. But #11 on my business plan was PRAY, PRAY, PRAY! I have spent so much time praying that God will use me to help people, and show me the direction HE wants me to go. So, join me won't you? I would appreciate a little shout out in your daily prayer time! Thanks!
Be fruitful and multiply!
Doula Tiffany

My Big Week

I had my first birth this week! I got a call after our small group on Wednesday, to go shadow for a doula and get some experience! I was nervous and ecstatic! On my drive downtown, I prayed and assured myself I knew what to do and that I would do great.
When I got there, she had decided after several hours of back labor, that she would get an epidural. I thought to myself, "great, how am I going to get any experience?!" WELL, actually, when you are presented with a situation that on any given day, you would turn your nose up at, you are probably going to learn something! Not that i necessarily turn my nose up at epidurals, I just wasn't aware of my role, as a doula, when one has been given. Little did I know the work it is to hold someone in a position to push for 3 hours!! WOWZA!! She did so great and worked SO hard for those 3 hours. However, after 3 hours you would think a baby would move down some. Especially after dilating from a 4 to an 8 in about an hour and a half! However, the baby had not made any progress, so they checked to see what was going on. Turns out the baby was stuck in the pelvis and there was NO WAY it was going to move through. So after a very tiring labor, she was told she had to have a C-Section.
So my first experience was different than I imagined it would be, my I'm so grateful I got the opportunity to see things in action! AND, the doula I shadowed sent me a referral of a girl that is due any day! I'm so excited and I'm sure you will be hearing about it soon!

No Tip Today

In trying to keep up with my "tips" each week, I started to feel like it was becoming more of a chore instead of a passion. Don't get me wrong, I want to be available for tips and questions, but I just started to draw blanks when trying to come up with a topic. And for goodness sake, I do NOT want anything I do on here to be done half way or without heart. So, we are not having a tip today. Just an honest outpouring of thoughts and feelings on my journey, thus far. I, certainly, did not think 3 months ago, that I would ever be as close as I am now, to being near the end of the certification process or so near to the births of a few of my dearest friends children. WOW! One of them today messaged me shock and anticipation that she is now in her third trimester! How exciting! I can't wait to be with them as they are bringing little tiny humans into the world. It still amazes me, no matter how much I read, or how many birthing videos I watch. IT'S AMAZING! I honestly wish I had more coming up, because I think I'm going to love it so much, I'm not going to want to wait around too long for another one. Actually, I wish I could doula for someone today! HA
There is just something about the process of carrying and birthing a child that makes people just stop and kinda go "whoa". In fact, yesterday I was talking to one of my best friends about all of it. Let me preface this by giving you some of her background. She is amazing. She has lived and worked in Barcelona, London, and currently New York at a big time bank. She is currently trying to decide WHICH Ivy League school to go to for her MBA (WHAT?!). She has traveled the world, including Thailand, Egypt (she floated the Nile), etc. She is an adventure seeker who sky dives among many other things. YET, when I was talking about being a Doula, she reacted with a sound of awe in her voice and said "whooooaaa that's awesome." That furthered my belief that God put something in each of us that makes us recognize what an awesome and intricate thing he has created! It blows my mind really!
Sometimes I wonder if people will take me seriously because I don't have children of my own yet. I hope they do. I have read several blogs of other doulas who got into it because of their own birth experience, whether good or bad. I love those stories, because it seems like they can pinpoint the defining moment that they realized what they wanted to do. Since I have never experienced labor personally, I don't have that kind of a story. My story is a little longer and seems as if several events over my life have brought me to this point. God created in me a sense of compassion and nurturing. That's where my story starts. And from there, people that have come into my life have inspired me even further. So again, I hope the "no child Doula" will have credibility!
Maybe I was just feeling extra sappy today, but these are just some things have been going through my mind lately, so I thought maybe they needed to be shared! I look forward to any comments, whether I know you or not!
Be fruitful and multiply!
Doula Tiffany